GENDER WAR: A TALE OF NEVER-ENDING FEUD

By Fatima Idakwo



Over the past few months, it has been quite difficult not to come across a discussion that was yet again a face-off between the ‘heads’ and the ‘necks’ as they are commonly referred to. This face-off mostly occurs on the internet where almost everyone feels the pressing need to air their views or better still, argue with every last vein in their body to ensure that their gender wins this never-ending feud that seems to be causing a lot of havoc and chaos.

If I am to trace back the origin of this war, I would say that it began a long time ago when women revolted against society demanding fairness and equality, a stop to the limitations placed on women and their abilities. Furthermore, granting women the liberty they desperately needed led to the uprising of some movements that in all honesty, probably shouldn’t have started in the first place. All these old practices and gender movements helped to shape the ideologies that most people in today’s society carry about in those pink brains of theirs.

Personally, I think this war is far from being over. I know it may seem ironic given the fact that I am championing for an end to the war however, my direct exposure to these face-offs on the internet has not only succeeded in showing me how blindly some people present their arguments but also, has showed me how deeply this war has affected the mindset of a significant number of individuals, myself included. My reason for stating the first sentence in this paragraph lies solely in the affected mindset of individuals. This has some sort of ripple effect that keeps passing from one mind to another, from one generation to the next, and might take a few years before it is completely wiped off the brains of people in the society.

It may seem like a harmless situation until you listen to people’s opinions about gender war. Only then can you realize how deeply this has eaten into society.  The internet doesn’t seem to be helping either because it provides the opportunity for all sorts of opinions to be pushed into the consciousness of anyone who spends time on the internet.

What exactly am I getting at? Well, I just feel the need to shed more light on these fights between the men and men, these fights are not merely another flex but a situation that would most likely keep getting worse should it not be contained immediately. The fights seem to center around the ridiculous level of expectation that society places on both genders, something that I could never see myself coming to terms with. However, I wouldn’t totally blame anyone who has these expectations because they have been brainwashed over time to see things from such an angle.

For me, the most annoying part of this war is the stereotype that comes with it. We fail to realize that we live in a world where people are as diverse as the flowers in a flower market. So, I ask myself, why can’t we all just take the time to understand a person for who they are rather than categorize them into a set of ideas? When will we learn to take off the labels when referring to certain persons - Why not say ‘Mr. G’ is a cheat rather than men are cheaters? Or ‘Ms. H’ is a gold digger rather than women are gold diggers? We all need to rid ourselves of this mindset that I’d like to think has existed for some thousand and one years.

As stated in the preceding paragraph, ridding ourselves of this mindset is a battle that might take another thousand and one years to win. And even though I am unsure of my odds of winning, it is a battle I am prepared to fight because I’d like to give myself a fighting chance. I want us to give this battle a fighting chance, the gender war has lasted longer than it should have.

Having said all this, I hope to see a reduction in the number of gender stereotypes and baseless gender arguments on the internet. I hope that the day will come when society is free from the ridiculous archaic mindset about gender and gender roles.

It is high time for the seemingly never-ending war to end.


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